How bad is Replicas? I did not know this fact before watching it, but Nicholas Cage turned down the lead role. When it comes to Keanu Reeves, I have no discernment between good and bad so when I saw the clearly poor preview, I simply thought yes, please. Thank God that movie theaters saved me from myself, and Replicas was playing too far away and infrequently for me to practically be able to see it. It left theaters after two weeks. So as soon as it was available for home viewing, I got it and watched it immediately.
Replicas is about a mad scientist motivated by tragedy to push the limits of morality and science to recover what he has lost. It stars Keanu Reeves as the protagonist and Thomas Middleditch of Verizon commercial fame as his coworker and best friend. I love sci fi. I love bad movies. I love Keanu Reeves. Please trust me when I warn you not to see this movie.
Replicas makes Looper feel restrained in terms of sci fi tropes. There is artificial intelligence, cloning, evil government/corporation conspiracies. There is a Russian nesting doll of artificial countdown clocks within the narrative. The mad scientist has until the end of the quarter to get his idea to work. He has seventeen days to get fix his family. Five days to return the library book. Three days to eat the food in the refrigerator before it goes bad. We get it! He is Under Pressure, the Muzak version, not the David Bowie and Freddie Mercury version. Maybe you think that I’m exaggerating, and all sci fi movies are that ridiculous.
Replicas doesn’t even understand the basics about human behavior and simple logistics of the plan. How dear sir are two men moving so much equipment? If you are someone’s ride or die friend, would you help them move dead bodies, conduct ethically dubious experiments but draw the line at naming people? If you had a scientist with the power to clone someone, would that scientist be considered disposable? If it only take seventeen days to do something impossible, instead of doing your best impression of Sophie’s Choice or your brand name Killing of a Sacred Deer, why not make up an excuse then cook up the next one at the end of the first term clones? People outside your home are already noticing a plethora of innocuous things because the protagonist is acting hella shifty, but you can’t wipe them. If this universe has cops investigating missing car parts, they are going to look into missing persons. Also the preview misled me and had me believe that the tragedy would only be shown in flashbacks, but we see it happen in real time, and it was worse and more of an unrealistic reaction than even I was willing to allow. It is almost as bad as on day one of the zombie apocalypse, you have turned into a killing, survival machine. You are nuts if your first reaction is to do some crazy, outlandish crap. You have to pace yourself and work your way up to, “I know what I’ll do….” True this movie still makes better choices than the real life players in Chappaquiddick, but that is not saying much. There are zero, plausible emotional breathers in this film, just reckless reactions and absurd solutions, which is really tragic because even 47 Ronin, which is absolutely not a good film, still manages to have some level of pathos and emotional resonance since it feels as Reeves is imbuing his real life pain to infuse authentic emotion in a ridiculous movie that shares plot points with his actual life. Replicas’ protagonist and Reeves’ life overlap in terms of actual loss and the catalyst to that loss, and yet it is missing the same poignant and personal notes that Reeves managed to convey in 47 Ronin.
Reeves isn’t the only one not giving his best to Replicas. Alice Eve, whom I loved in Iron Fist and would absolutely give her a spinoff series, is absolute dreckitude in this movie, which I saw before the Marvel Netflix series. I have apparently seen her in other films, but I totally don’t remember her in them: Sex and the City 2, The Raven, Men in Black 3 and Star Trek Into Darkness. Unfortunately she is memorable in this movie for the wrong reasons. She is awful. We have been blessed to see actors play numerous roles in the same movie or television series and distinguish those characters so a viewer can instantly understand what is happening in the film: Eliza Taylor, Tatiana Maslany, Clark Gregg, Blake Lively, Dakota Johnson, Lena Headey. Eve is blandly weird at the beginning of the film when she should be normal. It kind of gives her nowhere to go as the movie unfolds.
Replicas is derivative and blatantly rips off such films as Terminator, Robocop, Frankenstein, Final Destination, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind and Stepford Wives. It also manages to miss the deeper significance of those movies and plays everything straight instead of mining these innovative masterpieces for texture and nuance. It is as if a machine ingested all these movies then regurgitated the events in a random order without wondering what the broader metaphorical implications would be of this plot in terms of what it reflects about actual society. It is blissfully unaware of, instead of intentionally commenting on, the patriarchal orientation of society that does not even consider issues of consent and autonomy. The movie seems horrified that a corporation can dominate people, but unaware that a person has exercised a similar proprietary control over other people. The end of this film never grapples with the latter and may not even realize it is an issue raised in the film because the filmmakers actually may think it is reasonable on some level. The amount of gaslighting and lying is so inherently harmful and dangerous though the film seems to consider it a loving and reasonable response considering the circumstances. Also it teases a doppleganger tension then simply accepts it as if it is isn’t even worth a second thought.
Replicas is so hellbent at creating wholeness for its protagonist that it sacrifices its credibility by failing to root the concept in any level of reality, talent, expertise or artistry. I’m not going to definitively say that it is the worst movie of 2019, but I will say that it is a strong contender considering that I cannot think of anything that I liked about this movie. If you or someone that you love was bad this year, I suppose that watching it as a Christmas movie during the holidays would be the cinematic equivalent of putting coal in a stocking so it has that going for it. Do not watch this film even for the love of Reeves! Apparently his production company developed the story and the screenplay. Nooooooooooo. Whyyyyyyyyy? He deserves so much better.