I decided to watch Togetherness because I heard that one of the characters said that if he could do anything, he would read a book in Barnes & Noble. I thought the characters were going to be my kind of people I actually like tv shows that are realistic, but it was a weird mixture of emotionally realistic, but precious circumstances.
A married couple invites the wife’s sister, who decides during a recent visit to move from Texas to California for a better quality of life, and the husband’s unemployed acting friend to live with them. For a married couple with two kids, they have an awful amount of time to play hipster kick the can or go away awkwardly together. All the actors do a phenomenal job of communicating a complex array of emotions to the audience in a very short amount of time. Unfortunately emotional resonance is a two-edged sword. I decided to watch Togetherness in one sitting, and by the end, I was thoroughly depressed. If I want to watch excruciating relationships realistically unravel or awful personal dynamics, I don’t need to watch tv.

SPOILERS

I thought the wife/mother was awful, and NOT because she decided to have the affair, which was practically a footnote to her season long awfulness (but what a great song in that last scene in the season finale). Very early in Togetherness she basically illustrated a dynamic that constantly repeats in the series. She decides that she wants to do something then basically makes her husband do it without consent, and if he expresses even the least bit of lack of enthusiasm, she makes it emblematic of how he is ignoring her needs whereas she is the one ignoring his needs and not asking for mutual, negotiated consent. When he says the Barnes & Noble line, she is offended that he does not want to spend time with her instead of empathizing and saying that she wants to be alone sometimes too, which she has already done secretly on many occasions. What isn’t fine is flirting with underage boys, Mrs. Robinson. Her husband approaches her honestly and imperfectly, but she puts on the cloak of honesty and emotional exploration to hide what she really wants and does-to be alone, to be with anyone but him, but to still project this perfect mom and wife image instead of screaming her real self from the roof tops. Melanie Lynskey, who plays the wife/mother, is luminous, voluptuous and gorgeous. She does an amazing job of creating sexual energy and tension just by moving chairs in a potential classroom. Still Togetherness was more like a horror movie for me. I’ll keep watching it, but I’ll need to watch it when everything else is pretty awesome.