When I saw Zoolander 2, it was not a great week. I had dealt with some business casual stop in your tracks racism. SCOTUS was delivering some nineteenth century opinions then Justice Kennedy resigned. THEN we found out why he may have resigned. It was in that spirit that I decided to watch the fifteen years later sequel without much to recommend it other than I am a completist, and I enjoyed the first film.
It would not be an exaggeration to say that Zoolander 2 seemed like such a mistake that I questioned everyone on screen’s life choices because I thought that they were better than that: Jim Lehrer, Jane Pauley, Christiane Amanpour, Katie Couric, not Matt Lauer, whom I have hated since PM Magazine. Cue old person rant about this is why people can’t distinguish between fact and fiction because the line between news and entertainment are completely blurred.
Zoolander 2 began to look up with the random Billy Zane cameo delivering inspirational speeches and Netflix DVDs. The whole Da Vinci Code thriller action movie spoof was theoretically funny, but elicited no genuine laughs until after 51 minutes when I no longer had to solely rely on Ben Stiller and Owen Wilson for laughs. There is a major supporting role by one of my favorite rock stars that involved a long running gag on the fundamentalist aphorism that God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve, which ultimately turned the whole movie around from being dreadful. By the time that Will Ferrell appears after 60 minutes, the laughs exponentially increase every second until the denouement when I literally could not hear the dialogue because I was laughing so hard at the stupidity. Ferrell just tucks the movie under his arm and walks away with it, and the writers of his scenes is almost prophetic in how they seem to reference Stephen King’s It. Between the cameos, the physical humor and the ridiculous story, I ended up loving the sequel so much that I watched it again the next night.
The last fifty minutes of Zoolander 2 are so good that I watched the movie two times in a row in spite of the lackluster, tasteless initial fifty-one minutes. When I say tasteless, there is a disaster that occurs on October 5, 2001, which if it was funny, I would sign a waiver, but it isn’t. There are transphobic jokes, which maybe at the time, writers were unaware of how they were offensive, but they didn’t age well even a year later as cis people learn more about what is and is not acceptable. The gag would have been funnier without them because Benedict Cumberbatch is perfect in the way that he responds to their ignorance, but the implication of the comments surrounding All is that All is a weird trend that takes things too far and should not be accepted, which if and when those ideas are extrapolated about other groups that the majority finds off putting, could be dangerous to marginalized groups.
While I may theoretically enjoy seeing Stiller and Wilson together, their schtick does not make the ship float. To be fair, Wilson is actually funnier with every other pairing beside Stiller so while this movie would not exist without Stiller, his on screen work is just not that funny. Kiefer Sutherland did his thing, and he was funnier with Wilson than Stiller. While I would rather that Penelope Cruz did not have this movie on her resume, I have to admit that her long running breast grabbing gag had me cracking up. Milla Jovovich’s appearance was brief, but I loved it. She always delivers perfect performances regardless of the set up.
While Kristen Wiig, who is unrecognizable, and Kyle Mooney, did solid work, their appearances were not so good that they stood out or made the movie better. So while they did not hurt the movie, they do not get the Will Ferrell award for single handedly executing a 180 in quality shift. That award would have to go to Nathan Lee Graham as Todd, Farrell’s assistant, who may be playing a stereotype, but does it so well and is so weird in the cosigning of his boss’ behavior, that you have to admire the craftsmanship of their scenes together. There are some truly brilliant blink and you will miss it moments that he gives the screen without being too much.
For best comedic cameo in Zoolander 2 by someone who does not do this professionally, the award has to go to Anna Wintour, who plays it so straight and nasty that she gets kudos for having a sense of humor about her reputation. She does not sound wooden (Tommy Hilfinger) in the delivery of her lines or flat in her presence (Alexander Wang) that you almost forget that she is there. The runner up is Marc Jacobs, whom, with a little work, could sound less as if he is performing a skit on a high school stage. All criticism aside, every fashion world cameo shows a healthy sense of security that they were willing to make fun of themselves, and they probably did a better job than I ever could if I had to perform similarly.
I have no idea why it took so long for Zoolander 2 to gain momentum, but once it did, I loved it. This humor is “so stupid,” but it works. I was entertained, and I wish that I could just tell you to fast forward to the funny portion of the movie, but you really need the whole context to appreciate the story’s destination. I would completely understand if you decided to do something better with one hundred one minutes because life is short, but while all of it may not be worth it, it more than makes up for its earlier missteps.