Waitress is proof that there is a difference between intellectually understanding how abuse works and seeing it. Even though I understood that the main character, played by Keri Russell, was only acting like she consented to her husband’s will because it was easier than dealing with the physical consequences of confrontation, I was still frustrated and clenched for the entire duration of Waitress.I was also frustrated by the ways that all the characters tried to escape the horrors of their real life by engaging in more negative behavior that would only further complicate instead of resolve a bad situation. Also for a film dealing with how people cope with abuse, Waitress appalled me by cosigning the standard that if a guy is “nice,” likes you, and refuses to take no for an answer, then that is not stalking, but romance and true love. We’re not doing guys any favors by propagating this standard because you know what isn’t great-restraining orders and criminal records. We’re not doing girls any favors by saying that we have to care about the stalker’s feelings, and maybe we don’t know what we really want by saying no. Also I have an irrational inability to believe that Nathan Fillion is likable since he appeared in Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I’m inherently suspicious of films that take place in that South, but aren’t made by Southerners. I feel like we Yankees feel more comfortable equating negative characteristics with a Southern accent while we share the same negative attributes regardless of regional differences. Even though Waitress ends up being a fairy tale in the way that everything works out in the end-complete with a fairy godfather, Waitress was still not enjoyable to watch. It probably does not help that I am more of a savory than a sweet fan. After I finished Waitress and found out that the director, Adrienne Shelly, was killed, it retroactively imbued it with more meaning, but I’m going to stand firm with my original feeling. I found Waitress too realistic and would rather have those negative emotions in real life where I can at least show empathy and concern for an individual than a fictional piece of entertainment pegged as a romance or comedy when it really is neither.