If you must see one film that adapts a magazine article about an old man committing crimes, then definitely see The Old Man & The Gun, but if you must see every film directed and/or starring Clint Eastwood, then still see The Old Man & The Gun, but afterwards see The Mule and experience the chasm of quality. If I was told earlier that it was based on a true story, I may have dragged my feet a little less because WHAT!?! It is based on a New York Times Magazine article called “The Sinaloa Cartel’s 90-Year Old Drug Mule.” Basically white privilege goes on an illicit road trip.
Every fifty-two percenter kept urging me to see The Mule in theaters, which was enough of a reason to run screaming in the opposite direction. Fool me once, Green Book, by dangling Mahershala Ali in front of me, shame on you. Eastwood may get my appreciation as an icon, but he won’t get my money so I dutifully waited until it was available to watch at home. I’m not sure what those ladies got out of this movie other than confirmation that Mexicans lurk every corner, including engagement parties, ready to exploit the economic anxiety of Americans whose work has been obliterated by the Internet. Get off my lawn!
Unlike The Old Man & The Gun, The Mule didn’t trigger me because um, dude is working for a drug cartel. They could kill you! What are you doing?!? The entire movie, I was just sitting there wondering when he was going to get shot dead, and his body dumped never to be seen by his loved ones again, but I didn’t know until the end of the movie that it was a true story otherwise I would not have been waiting for the other shoe to drop.
The Mule is made by the same writer who wrote Gran Torino, but people did not respond with broad, effusive praise because unlike Gran Torino, it is not subconsciously capitalizing on Eastwood’s movie career as a bad ass, but on his personal history as a man who put himself over his family. It is easy to get revved up, anticipating that at any minute this old man is going to throw hands at a bunch of younger men not ready for Dirty Harry. In this movie, the only skills that this man has is charm, the ability to drive long distances without a break and a green thumb. No one wants to think of Eastwood in less than heroic terms even though he gives us ample reason to, and in this film, he is a potential victim albeit a complicit one. He has already lost, but he doesn’t know it yet. Also all those cutesy saying racist stuff because I’m lovable and just ribbing you Gran Torino energy in The Mule makes it seem like Eastwood’s character is suicidal. It is all fun and games to make deportation jokes to your gardeners, but if the dudes with guns who want to beat your ass don’t appreciate your humor, you’re dead. We’re still supposed to believe that he can charm any audience, but um, no. We’re watching a horror movie with a skinny old man. You’re rooting for the cops to catch him so he can get rescued from his own stupidity.
Also are drug cartels so micromanagey? It feels as if they could have exploited this dude until he naturally entered the ground because he genuinely enjoyed the attention, but they got in their own way. The Mule’s real lesson isn’t the importance of family. It is to reward individuality in your employees when it leads to success by trusting them instead of assigning more supervisors to rein that person in. If you need that many supervisors, then just let the supervisors do the job because it gets ridiculous. Don’t let your ego get in the way of your success. A real boss doesn’t have to prove it.
I imagine that The Mule received a tiny bump because it was released after A Star Is Born, and Bradley Cooper plays a more professional version of the Casey Affleck role from The Old Man & The Gun. I know that I was delightfully surprised to see Cooper, Michael Pena and Laurence Fishburne, but their limited function is to act like human stopwatches counting down the end of his eleventh-hour foray into a life of a crime. It feels like a complete waste of charisma and talent.
The following is a little spoiler, but Eastwood’s character’s come to Jesus moment involves a realization that his family is actually the most important part of his life, not the adulation of strangers, so he prioritizes them over the drug cartel. Um, for real?!? Adjust your priorities when your business involves day lilies, not moving drugs for a cartel! You decide to be a better person NOW that your life is in danger. On one hand, when his family finds out what he did, boy will they feel important looking back at that moment. On the other hand, have you ever watched a movie about what drug cartels do to people who cross them?!?
Speaking of family, Eastwood’s real life daughter plays his onscreen daughter, and don’t tell anybody, but she isn’t good. Also sincere question to my readers: would you be angry that your daddy didn’t walk you down the aisle if you already had a child? I get it theoretically if he said that he would do it, but if you’re an adult and know that your dad has always let you down, then why would you even want him to walk you down the aisle. I feel as if you let him ruin your day. She was giving me high school tantrum instead of grown ass woman mad so I’m not sure if the fault lies with her or the director for making her act like a little girl. He has the family play a generally hysterical note, which Dianne Wiest manages to not make irritating because she is the best. When the granddaughter gets disappointed by her grandfather the first time that he said no to her, I intellectually understood that she spent her entire life hearing negative comments about him, but I was still not understanding. He was always there for you. He should get one pass before you jump to ten on the attitude meter. Again Eastwood is the director so he is instructing these characters to seem disproportionately aggrieved at his bad behavior in order to gain the viewer’s sympathy so maybe I’ll blame Eastwood wanting cinematic cookies for the bare minimum of decency.
The Mule is an entertaining movie simply because it is a real story, and I can’t believe that an old dude decided to put his life endanger and work for the bad guys, but I wonder if a little digging would reveal that he wasn’t an angel for a much longer time. For a Clint Eastwood film, it is one of his weaker movies because I’m not entirely sure that Eastwood successfully emotionally transferred to the viewer what he was trying to get them to feel about his character since I was mostly left with questions.