I set the bar really low for Charlize Theron because I like her, but just because she finally found action movie success in Mad Max: Fury Road didn’t mean that I forgot about her central roles in mediocre to awful action films such as Aeon Flux and Hancock. I’m not sure how she earned my bottomless goodwill, but she hasn’t lost it yet. When I saw the previews for Atomic Blonde, I was cautiously psyched. As long as the fight scenes were awesome, and the story was not too annoying, I’d like the movie. I suppose that I needed to set the bar a little lower.
Atomic Blonde bored me after the first half hour, and I kept checking my watch. The summer of 2017 has been a glut of period films of varying quality, but this film unfolds immediately before and after the Berlin Wall falls in 1989. To make things worse, the film begins near the end, and we basically know what happens so any tension or suspense is squandered. There are numerous flashbacks either based on her memory or elicited from Theron’s character during a debriefing in a M16 interrogation room, which is yet another way to approach the “how we got here” trope, except if you think about it, it does not make sense. She tells them stories about people’s perspectives when she was not present. This trope is inherently flawed, and I loathe when stories use it.
I am not usually a fan of the spy genre because it can confuse intrigue for narrative development if done poorly. Atomic Blonde plays a shell game that aims to raise the stakes, but just keeps moving the goal post: we have to retrieve this information, we have to save this person, we have to find and stop this person. If you want a rat to get through a maze, you only use one piece of cheese. I kept thinking, “Why do I even care? This will all be moot when the Wall falls. It is over. You’re all going to lose funding and get fired for a few years.” Keep it simple and satisfying. Everyone keeps comparing this film to John Wick, but John Wick’s goal is revenge, which is fairly easy for a viewer to invest in and relate to. Only his world is intricate. I actually figured out fairly early everything that was happening so when it was finally revealed, I could not believe that I was right and found the whole enterprise anti-climatic. There are dead giveaways if you pay attention. There was only one idea that I did not fully consider as a result of the big reveal, but ultimately triple crosses bore me. It is like a four-pronged trident. Stop while you’re ahead.
I have one major reason to like Atomic Blonde. John Wick: Chapter 2 was a way better film than its predecessor, and it is possibly related to David Leitch leaving it completely in Chad Stahelski’s hands to direct this movie. Leitch can be visually proud of his work. Atomic Blonde is a gorgeous, slick film. The marriage of music, action and plot was second only to Baby Driver. The use of Theron’s skin as a reflection of her mood and environment, another screen to project the plot on to, is a great idea. I love the 80s, and sitting in a dark theater listening to (RIP) David Bowie’s sexy voice sing Cat People (side note: which is from a soundtrack of a movie with the same title) is enough to mollify me. Quentin Tarantino may want some money for stealing an action sequence from Inglourious Basterds.
Atomic Blonde should be proud of its action sequences, but not so proud that they can’t wait until the movie is released and show the majority of them in the previews. The best fight scene is near the end because it is the only one that I was surprised to see. Theron does an amazing job, but I am sad that she put in a lot of effort for such a weak story. She wants the action crown so badly, but this film is another stumbling block in her ascent. Remember Angelina Jolie’s Salt. They can do it, but not alone. Sofia Boutella, who is normally a screen stealer and badass action character in every film that I have seen her in (Kingsman: The Secret Service, Star Trek Beyond and The Mummy), was wasted in this one. I have always liked James McAvoy despite his questionable movie choices, but even though he gave his all and hammed it up, I was somewhat annoyed because I did not feel that he brought anything new to the dissolute expat spy. It is like Robert DeNiro’s career-he is good, but it does not matter because everyone, including him, knows that it probably is not a timeless masterpiece.
Atomic Blonde is an overly long, MacGuffin laden narrative that gets in the way of aesthetically satisfying and athletic performances set to a great soundtrack. I did learn something while watching the film: the German word for bitch is zuker.