The Amityville Horror (1979) frequently aired on WPIX in NYC during my childhood. I never rewatched it as an adult so I recall it as an amazing horror movie with numerous iconic moments that have been copied by lesser successors. The original cast was pretty amazing: James Brolin and Margot Kidder.
The Amityville Horror (2005) is a remake that uses the jump scares and CGI of the 21st century to inadvertently make the story less scary. For those of you under a rock, The Amityville Horror (2005) is about a supernaturally troubled house. The real part is that the house is a former crime scene when the eldest child killed his family, his parents and four siblings. A newlywed couple and the wife’s three children from a previous marriage move into the affordable home, and supernatural shenanigans ensue. The stepfather becomes aggressively antagonistic to his family. The dog dies. It is revealed that in the 17th century, Rev John Ketchum was basically a serial killer, and his victims were Native Americans. Ketchum’s spirit possesses and murders anyone who lives in the house. I don’t remember the Ketchum part playing such an aggressive role in the original. The Amityville Horror (2005) stars Ryan Reynolds and Melissa George of Alias fame.
The scary house genre is overdone, which is a shame because The Amityville Horror (2005) should be able to get dibs, but just becomes a more expensive tedious paint by the numbers supernatural flick. The Amityville Horror (2005) has a few things going for it: Ryan Reynolds’ abs and his transformation from affable fellow to abusive stepfather. The wood chopping scenes with the eldest stepson are the most terrifying ones in the entire film. A young Chloe Grace Moretz appears as one of the stepchildren, and legend Philip Baker Hall appears as the priest, but there is not much that they can do to elevate The Amityville Horror (2005).
I am most angry that The Amityville Horror (2005) did not give me blood dripping from faucets, but gave me numerous random ghost specters. Come on! The Amityville Horror (2005) needed to recall what make the original special. Also after the worst babysitter in the world loses her mind, no one in his or her right mind would spend a second more in that house.
Since the original was made, the supernatural theory was largely debunked, and a stepson has basically said that his stepfather was abusive with or without the supernatural assistance. The Amityville Horror (2005) is fighting an uphill battle against the gravity of reality and the downpour of horrific houses that are pale imitations of the original. Unless you really need an excuse to see Ryan Reynolds’ abs, skip The Amityville Horror (2005).