The Young Messiah is the filmmakers’ imagination of what happened to Jesus when his family left Egypt to return to Nazareth. Jesus is an annoying kid. In the Bible, he did wander off to go to the Temple, which seemed at least like an objectively good reason, but this Jesus is always running ahead of his family on the street, running into Roman soldiers and entering people’s houses when uninvited. How many times do you and your family need to be nearly killed before you stay close? Also my Jesus would ask for an invitation, not just go into people’s homes.
Meanwhile Herod orders the Roman soldiers to find and kill a boy returning from Egypt that may have escaped his father’s purge. Um, they don’t have photos, and at one point, the Roman soldiers recognize a woman as an escaped slave. OK, sure. There is so much foreboding that they should have just had a character run up to the titular character when he was walking past a bunch of crucifixes screaming, “You’re GOING TO DIEEEEEEE!” We are supposed to believe that these soldiers are the same soldiers involved in the slaughter of the innocents and still rock themselves at night by the horrors of what they did. OK, sure.
The Young Messiah is not a good movie by any standard. The story is trash and just recycles later stories of Jesus as an adult instead of imagining something new. There are a few seconds when The Young Messiah toys with the idea of being germane to current events by alluding to Jesus’ refugee status, but that concept gets dropped abruptly.
The casting is annoying. The Young Messiah should be called The Young British Foppish Boy. I felt like Sue Sylvester from Glee complaining about that boy’s curls. Everyone was SO BRITISH, especially the titular character. If Jesus was at least dressed like a dandy, I could have moved on. Is this supposed to take place in the Middle East or at the break room for Game of Thrones? The Blackfish, Ned and Walder Frey all made appearances in The Young Messiah so they had some bills to pay.
If I had to find something positive about The Young Messiah, it would be three things. First, I liked the old lady verbally disarming the Roman soldiers with empathy and food. “You have such a hard job. Snacks?” Second, I like the idea of Satan gunning for Jesus at all times, and Jesus sounding like a crazy person because only He can see him. Unfortunately Satan does not know where to get a proper dye job though his makeup is on fleek. Third, I liked Jesus’ uncle. He was cool and fun and seemed like a real human being. Can we get a movie called The Young Messiah’s Uncle?
I love bad movies. I love Christian movies. I even love poorly made Christian movies. Do NOT see The Young Messiah. Can anything good come from The Young Messiah? No!