Your mom didn’t love you, and your grandpa died and left you with nothing. Now what? The main character goes to Mexico. I am so over the genre of white guys go to Mexico, and then the crap hits the fan. I know that it is an extremely reductive summary of All the Pretty Horses, but maybe I am influenced by seeing it so soon after The Counselor, which also stars Penelope Cruz and is another Cormac McCarthy story, but shares little else. I adore Billy Bob Thornton, and he directed All the Pretty Horses so I decided to watch it. It probably ended up in my queue because of a brief appearance by Robert Patrick, whom I love and is one of the great American actors who rarely gets used to his full capacity. Things are no different in All the Pretty Horses. All the Pretty Horses is a random, rambling movie that suddenly gets focused in a handful of cliche ways. The highest praise that I can give All the Pretty Horses is at least it doesn’t treat women like Kevin Costner’s Revenge. I know that All the Pretty Horses may have been a victim of editing, but I don’t care. All the Pretty Horses is a coming of age story that feels contrived and lacks conviction.