Blasphemous? No. Impertinent? Yes. Is “Dogma” (1999) Kevin Smith’s best film? Absolutely! When two exiled angels, Loki (Matt Damon) and Bartleby (Ben Affleck), receive a tip on how to return to heaven, Metatron (Alan Rickman), a seraphim angel who doubles as the voice of God, summons Bethany Sloane (Linda Fiorentino), a devout Catholic, divorced, barren worker at a women’s clinic, i.e. abortion clinic, to stop them. With the help of two prophets, Jay (Jason Mewes) and Silent Bob (Smith), the thirteenth apostle, Rufus (Chris Rock), and Serendipity (Salma Hayek), a muse turned stripper, can Bethany stop the end of existence and restore her faith in God? Light work, and it only took four days.

Real recognizes real. Smith gets more right than wrong theologically, and don’t forget that it is a comedy. “Dogma” serves more as a jumping off point to disguise and air out long standing grievances against the Catholic Church and theology as dialogue, from the superficial,  revisionist interpretation of women and people of color in the Bible (all the apostles were people of color, not white, but whatever), to moving away from male as authority to the vaguely accurate genderless issues spiritual world and the shameless gambit of the church to be relevant more than faithful. All the criticisms stand and then some. Only a real believer arranges for God (Alanis Morissette) to save the day, and if it does not work, blame wardrobe more than the singer. Up to that point, wardrobe was killing it, especially with the hidden armor under the unassuming hoodies—did not know that the hoodies were supposed to be symbols for halos, but that skirt was horrible though the shorts underneath were a relief. If I recall, my biggest grievance was being able to see the face of God, which was Biblically dangerous, as opposed to the voice of God, but hey if I made movies and had Rickman’s delicious voice on hand, I’d cast him as God’s voice too. Rickman was a brilliant actor, and rewatching this movie again is a treat because could he be more scrumptious with his irreverent, dry delivery and goth vibe with the pale skin and jet-black hair.

Also, for the kids out there, “Dogma” was filmed when Affleck and Damon as a pair was still novel and cool, not overdone and tolerated. Smith always had a closer professional relationship with Affleck, and Affleck brought Damon along for the ride. Seeing them together at the turn of the twentieth century was a bit of neat stunt casting, not eyeroll worthy. They looked (and were) so young then! They are just babies. It was revolutionary to cast such young princes of Hollywood as ancient angels, and Smith and the acting duo probably deserve a lot of credit from “Supernatural” for treating their characters like normal people with family issues, huge functional, feathery wings pumping with blood and bad attitudes. They really understood the terrifying side of angels who had been to war and had the task of slaughtering tons of innocents. Smith is a self-deprecating fellow, but he deserves undiluted praise for making the pair’s dynamic seem surprising and shocking. At first, Loki is a mansplaining, manipulative, homicidal maniac, which makes sense as the Angel of Death whereas Bartleby is chill and laid back. During their journey from Wisconsin to New Jersey, they change or become more of who they are. Loki was always a zealot, but his faith in God actually redeems him whereas Bartleby is still full of ideas about how God should run things but finally acknowledges the implication of that mindset. Affleck is a limited actor, but Smith learned early on that he relishes playing bad guys and can let loose then.

I totally forgot that Linda Fiorentino was in “Dogma” as the only hope to stop the end of existence, which is forgivable considering that she has not appeared on screen since 2009. Is it because she was difficult to work with? Harvey Weinstein once owned the right to this film. Did she cross him then he blacklisted her? Was she involved in a love triangle involving a private investigator and a FBI agent to work on a movie, but got caught in the crossfire of wiretapping and racketeering charges? I did not even hear of that one today. It does not matter because she has the hardest job in the bunch. She is not instantly recognizable as the rest of the cast, plays a straight woman with actual emotions and puts up with a lot of sexist dialogue that is supposed to be funny but is the least humorous aspect of the plot. She also plays an expert Catholic who somehow did not know that Jesus had siblings, that He was Black (or at least a person of color) or that Mary was only a virgin in the beginning, but not for her entire life. Bethany is doing nothing to dispel the myths that Catholics do not read the Bible.

Hayek’s appearance is a clear reference to “From Dusk till Dawn” (1996) with the twist that here she is supernatural, but a goody two shoes who left God on good terms. Also the level of violence is more characteristic of a Quentin Tarantino film than Smith usually portrays, but it is less noticeable because it is tame compared to visual media now. Smith seemed to borrow the penchant of “Xena: The Warrior Princess” to create a pastiche of mythologies by linking Greek with Christian legends then bring it into the twenty-first centuries with muses as frustrated artists cursed to give their best ideas to others. The good news is that she inspires the highest grossing films. Serendipity is not the only character saddled with Smith’s charming cinephile info dumping. Metatron complains about his lack of popularity because he was never depicted in a movie… before “Dogma.” Bartleby makes a Hulk reference from the Seventies television series. Also, Smith brilliantly introduces found footage or fake documentary elements with the news broadcast during the denouement.

If “Dogma” kind of falls apart, it is Metatron’s failure to just transport Bethany without explanation. Sure, there would be no movie, and Smith could not deliver a walking on water scene that underscores Jesus’ devastation in the beginning of His calling or the Garden of Gethsemane. Metatron’s advice: “Be who you’ve always been. Just be this as well.” Also how did Bethany get killed? At the time of its original release, I did not have an issue that Bethany’s only dream was to have a child with her loser husband, but now I find it annoying that her happy ending is to take after her great (multiplied by a lot) grandmother. I enjoyed the sound of buzzing flies with the evil skateboarders. It felt like a reference to “The Exorcist” (1973). I had no idea that they were the Stygian triplets, which is supposed to be a reference to the River Styx, a river in the Underworld from Greek mythology. If there is an explicit reference to their origins, I have now missed it twice. They are demonic teenage boys, which could be redundant phrasing, and that’s all I need.

“Dogma” was not widely available for home viewing because of Weinstein. Smith wrote the script before his first feature, “Clerks” (1994), but waited to release it so he would have enough money to realize his vision. Congratulations to Smith for getting the rights to “Dogma” back and getting a second chance at a first impression as it plays in theaters once more. Most of us do not get one moment of glory so even though Smith never topped this masterpiece on screen, his life seems to be even better. It is just wonderful to hear him talk about everyone and everything that he loves. We love you, Smith. Well done, good and faithful servant.